Why Practice?

Have you ever had one of those practices where ever posture felt like punishment?

Well, that was my practice this morning… there was a lot of self-pity “child’s pose” happening after each asana, along with some overly dramatic moaning and groaning as I chipped my way through the cement in my body, and even more so, in my mind.

I’m not sure if it was because today is the winter solstice, with the longest night of the year, but I was certainly feeling the heavy weight of the darkness pressing in on my thoughts as I slowly crawled my way through this morning’s yoga practice.

It made me think about why I choose to practice in the first place.

Have you ever stopped and asked yourself, “Why do I practice this Ashtanga Yoga?”

It certainly isn’t the easiest type of yoga out there.

It demands commitment right from the beginning, and doesn’t allow much room for flirting.

It requires a certain amount of trust in the process, courage to confront your fears and face your shadows, and the stamina to go the distance, even when it feels like more work then reward.

The practice demands all of this from a student before it will reveal the depth of its richness, or offer its bounty for the body and spirit.

For me, I practice because it carves out space within my body, and creates clarity in my mind.

It realigns me day after day with a higher purpose, and a more noble way of being in the world.

It teaches where to let go, and where I should hold on.

It strengthens my ability to bring forth the qualities such as patience, compassion, joy, forgiveness, peace, truth, and love.

It shows me that surrendering to something greater then myself is not as scary as it might seem, and that through renouncing the results of my effort, I find true freedom and release.

Today was one of those days. However, I was reminded that although I may not always feel fantastic during the practice, I somehow always feel better by the end, just for making it through, and doing my best on any giving day.

The practice is our mirror for life. As we polish the mirror daily, we can see more clearly the truth of who we are, and gain deeper insight into the ways we choose to live.

But it really is not so important to know why I practice this Yoga.

The real value is in answering this question for yourself: Why Do I Practice?

A Beginner's Mind

Last week I took a guided “intro ashtanga” yoga class in the evening. As I was driving home I realized that it had been at least six years since I had taken an evening yoga class!

And what a breath of fresh air! I’ve got to say, the change of time, space, teacher, and class setting infused new life into my practice.


As the class began, whilst sitting with eyes closed focusing on my breath, I became acutely aware of the smell of the musty walls and floor, mixed with the heat and faintest sent of sweat from a previous class.

This aroma sparked memories of my very first experiences learning yoga in the upstairs space of an old heritage building, home to the much loved ‘Yoga In Motion,’ the yoga studio which first introduced me to the practice of “Ashtanga Vinyasa” and “Power Yoga.”

As we began our first sun-salutations I became immersed in the divine sensation of clearing my mind of all distracting thoughts, only breath, movement, and the one guiding voice of the teacher existed for me.

The practice took on a life of its own, and the “I” part of my mind began to dissolve into a perfectly synchronized dance of breath and movement.

There was no place to go, nothing to rush off to, no demands to perfect or perform, no expectations, judgments, or evaluations.

It was like everyone else in the room had faded into some hazy distant background, and I felt both completely alone, and yet somehow intimately connected to every cell, every breath, every being, and everything.


There was a feeling of complete surrender. The atmosphere was soft, warm and safe, allowing me to fully relinquish my sovereignty and let go to the experience.

I realized that finding the time, space and atmosphere to facilitate this complete release was a real luxury, and its presence was an unexpected gift.

It actually came as a surprise, that somehow in this small unassuming class, I would rediscover the heart of my practice, and the reason why I was drawn to this ancient discipline so powerfully from the very beginning.

There it was, that familiar homelike warmth; kind of like wrapping myself inside an old, soft, faded, cashmere sweater liberated from some long forgotten drawer.

That space within was nurturing and calm. For a little over an hour I found myself relaxing more, sinking into it, and drinking from a deep refreshing pool, one I visit often, but frequently only have time to just dip my feet in, before rushing off to the next activity.

This experience reminded me that as we integrate the practice of Yoga into our daily life, it is important that we don’t allow these practices to become so routine that they are simply done mechanically, making them little more than another box to check off on our “to-do” list.

It really is essential that we keep our awareness steady as we practice, and always remember the reasons for our practice. Otherwise, instead of creating more space, more clarity, and more energy, our yoga becomes a chore, another mindless activity added to our already desperately over-scheduled and hectic lives.

It also rekindled the wonder of entering a class with a ‘beginner's mind,’ and a delight in rediscovering all the hidden gems that each posture has to offer, along with the pure joy of sharing and learning with others.

We are all teachers for each other in one way or another, and the more open we are to receiving, and being in relationship, the more we will grow. We can learn something from everyone, if we choose to; but it requires us to set aside our preconceived ideas, and become receptive to other points of view, and knowledge.


Sri K. Pattabhi Jois (Guruji) would always repeat that there were no “teacher trainings” only “student trainings,” and he would remind us that he, himself, was still a student.
We would all do well to remember these words.

Some days taking a step back, and starting over from the beginning is more helpful then pushing forward. It may seem at times like we are not “progressing,” but if we are sincere in our efforts we will realize that as long as we remain open to learning, growing and expanding, we are always moving closer to the goal of Yoga.

Every challenge we encounter is an opportunity for us to extend beyond our own perceived limitations, and to soar off into new horizons.

Is Your Love Enough?

It seems to be everywhere these days, the great debate: to vaccinate or not to vaccinate – that is the question... or is it?
My attention has certainly been aroused lately, but it seems that whatever side of the proverbial 'vaccination fence' we find ourselves sitting on, the real issue is: How much will we allow the collective fear of the world to infiltrate our hearts and minds?

The pull to buy into the hype and fear-mongering propaganda pushes against our psyche more and more. It drives us into darkness. Makes us feel isolated and alone.

On both sides of the issue there is fear. We vaccinate more and more as a way of avoiding pain, sickness, suffering and death; but over the years there has been some correlation between S.I.D.S, autism, and several neurological disorders and the administration of vaccines, and so we see a growing backlash against vaccinating, based on a fear of iatrogenic sickness, pain, suffering, and death.

There are a great many industries that benefit from keeping a large percent of the population in fear. The more fear we have the less able we are to expand beyond ourselves and to make connections with others; the less real connection we have in our lives, the more powerless and alone we may feel. The more powerless and alone we feel, the more insecure we become.

These feelings of insecurity make us more susceptible to the onslaught of images and ideas that bind us to a perpetual cycle of fear and contraction.

We hide our insecurity through consumption, attempting to create an image of confidence, to feel protected and powerful, and as a way of covering up our tireless longing to be desired, loved, and respected.

The more we consume, the more we buy, the more we buy, the more debt we create, the more debt we create, the more trapped we feel. The more trapped we feel the more we feed our feelings of isolation, insecurity, and weakness… and the cycle continues. More and more we feel trapped by a system that is profiting off our enslavement.

We become dependent upon the media to tell us what to think, believe, and feel.

This constant presence of fear prevents us from retreating into that soft silent place of knowing inside ourselves. The fear makes it difficult to really hear that still quiet voice guiding us from within.
Our daily yoga practice is a sacred time that allows us to reconnect to that inner space. We breathe into the silence of our soul, and somewhere in the emptiness that lingers between our thoughts, we begin to listen and respond to the soft voice of our gentle inner guide.

So, in my opinion, the real question is: How do we regain our independence amongst all the fear and pressure to conform on either side of an issue when there is no clear, definite, or undeniably correct answer?

We start by letting go of our need to be right. There are extremely educated people on both sides of this issue, each with good points and opinions, and data to back up their beliefs.

We begin to recognize and trust that being kind is more important then being right. We all know there are many issues we can debate, and the truth may just be that there is no unequivocal "right" answer that can be applied universally, but rather, it is an inner feeling that directs each individual to a conclusion that supports their personal choice.

And still we fear.

So, we might ask: How do we conquer fear?

The answer is so simple to say, and yet so challenging to act upon: Love is the antidote for fear.

We choose to love.

And this requires constant practice and perseverance. We must resist giving into the barrage of fear through love and actions based in love.

“There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out all fear” (1 John 4:18), and the foundation of love is ahimsa – non-harming.

When we learn to love each other, with a sincere love that is true and untainted by our lusts, we empower ourselves to give, to serve, and to support.

Real love does not seek its own gratification, it asks for nothing in return, but only seeks to give of itself fully and completely, without conditions, control, or manipulation. It always acts with the heart of compassion, and non-harming, seeking the highest good and growth for all.

When we begin to love with the explicit intention of giving, caring, and nourishing one another, we find ourselves in true relationship.

When we can create the space to support each other, to listen without judgment, and without always needing to agree or prove our point, we can preserve our mutual freedom, and these authentic bonds of love will begin to transform our own self and our world.

When we start to listen with love, we will sense the heart behind the words.

We will realize that we are not alone. We are intimately connected to each other in ways we cannot see or imagine.

Love will strengthens us; love will keep us healthy and strong.

Love will take care of the sick and weak, and continually offer to help those in need.

So what is the real question we should be asking ourselves?

The singer, songwriter, and poet, Michael Franti, sums it up perfectly when he rightly asks:

“Is your love enough? Or can you love some more?”

Elephants Never Forget a Friend

A Beautiful Little Story.

The Beauty We Love...

Let the beauty we love, be what we do.
~ Rumi ~

From the moment I first began this practice of Yoga - I loved it. It has inspired me in countless ways, and continues to do so day after day. I love introducing people to this practice and watching them awaken to themselves, revive their bodies, resuscitate their spirits, and recover a belief in their infinite potential.

Teaching new students always makes me smile, because I get to go back and remember how I felt in the early days of my yoga practice: I felt powerful, and real. It was quite literally like waking up and realizing you are connected to everything on the planet. I remember feeling like I could do anything. A deep-seated passion started clawing its way out of me, and I felt a compelling desire to change the world, or at the very least, make it a better, more beautiful, compassionate place. There was a distinct sense that all the answers I would ever need were hidden within myself, and all I had to do was uncover them.

I stood taller, walked with a new sense of confidence, and breathed deeper. Every breath was rejuvenating and sweet. I can remember feeling like all the toxins (and there was some serious toxic build-up I assure you) were being purged from my body, and I felt clean for the first time since I was a child: pure, simple, and soft. The idea of polluting my body started to become less and less appealing. I began eating healthier, and treating my body better. I felt a growing connection to the inherent life force within, and a deepening sense of self-worth (something I had never really felt before) and it penetrated every area of my life; all of my relationships changed because of this.

My connection to this practice began as a true love affair. I would have ecstatic emotions wash over me after every class, and when I left the room I felt as if I were walking on air.

I experienced so much joy and energy from this practice that I could not find enough people or activities to overflow it to. I wanted to have this experience more and more – I could not get enough. As a result, I practiced more, and immersed myself in every teaching I could find on this ancient philosophy for living, and way of seeing the world.

Alas, as with all brilliant love affairs, after some time, perhaps a few years or less, the “real world” began to creep back into my cloistered little ‘yoga-nirvana.’ Now, I found that many days the practice was challenging or even difficult. It seemed to push all my sensitive spots, pointing out areas of weaknesses, asking me to change certain things about my lifestyle, presenting obstacles to promote patience, strength, and perseverance.

Like every relationship, I was finding that this practice above all else, required consistent dedication, commitment, and daily attention. Some days it felt like more work then I thought I was capable of.

In the early days of Yoga practice I could not wait to get on my yoga mat, now… it required some strong determination, and it was only because of a promise I had made to myself to at least “show up,” that I would often even start to practice.

However, once the initial obstacle of getting on my mat was overcome, I found that I still loved it, challenging or not, and I still felt all the benefits and more afterwards. I would notice how it lifted my spirits, and created a sense of clarity in my thinking, and how much more balanced I felt from it.

The newness of first love had worn off, and the real practice had begun. Even though I did not have that same 'blissed-out,' rapturous sensation that often accompanied my early days of practice, I found that I had something much more substantial and grounded.

At this point I realized it was because of the Yoga that I made it through the day without a major breakdown. I would often find the practice with me periodically, sitting beside me in a stressful situation, whispering to me, “just breathed deeply,” and tenderly showing me how to release tension, before the anxiety could take hold.

The practice was with me in the passenger seat while driving the car, guiding me to be calm, telling me that there was no need to rush, assuring me that all things happen in their own perfect time. I would find it showing up in various situations all throughout my day, and because of it, I never felt alone.

These days, my relationship with this practice feels more like that of an intimate friend. I no longer find it sitting beside, but I carry it in my heart at all times.

My day would be incomplete without it, and I know that something essential would be missing from my life had it not found me.

It continues to bring me back to myself, while still challenging me to keep it real, be honest, let go.

It fully aids in transforming those dark nights into light, and it continually acts as my teacher both on and off the yoga mat.

It goes on gently revealing the many ‘blind spots’ I still have, and encourages more growth in those areas I would rather forget about.

Some days the practice is nurturing and tender, at other times it is strict and demanding; but every time I begin to inhale and lift my hands above my head, I know I have returned home.
Through teaching, I am reminded above all what this practice can be for people. I see the excitement at the start, the fresh joy of new love. I also witness the struggles and discipline that come up along the way, the contentment of coming home to an old friend, and the all the delight interwoven between each new transformation.

I get to witness the everyday commonplace courage that our students demonstrate on a regular basis every time they get on their mat.

I watch the practice be for them a lover, a teacher, a disciplinarian, a healer, a mother, a father, and a friend. I see all the work and effort that each person exerts in order to grow and change on a daily basis.

They become stronger and yet, somehow softer. They develop the willingness to bend, to adjust, to relate more intimately with their own self, and as a result, all their relationships deepen and become more meaningful.

Watching our students gives me hope. I find it tremendously inspiring to be a part of their journey. During those days when I catch myself wondering who is going to answer the many desperate cries from our planet, address issues of war and oppression, help cure hunger and hopelessness, bring friendship to the lonely and suffering, I look up and am reminded - We Are.

We practice for it daily. This practice of yoga not only works on us as individuals - transforming our lives; but it also brings us together.

Through our commitment to it, we begin to dip our feet into the ocean of the infinite, and taste something truly divine within. We recognize that we are all apart of this living, breathing, eternal life force, and that we are interdependent and indispensably connected.

Little by little the presence of this practice spreads into every area of our existence, and because of it we learn to listen.

When we take the time to develop this awareness, we realize that we instinctively know how to help each other, and will uncover our purpose more and more through working together to heal a world in need.